Selfish or not

As my friend and me were overtly expressing the rantings of our minds about the unfathomable secrets of life, we both came across a single dilemma. The ultimate tenet of any philosophical theory that strives to preach happiness is to find happiness in oneself. This brings us to a major moral predicament- “Doesn’t giving importance to one’s own happiness amount to selfishness?”

As I traced this thought through the alleys of my limited knowledge, I found the 
nearest possible answer in few verses from Bhagavatgeeta-

प्रजहाति यदा कामान्सर्ाान्पार्ामनोगिातन।
आत्मन्येर्ात्मना िुष्ट: स्थििप्रज्नस्तदोच्यिे।। (Chapter 2)
When Arjuna asks Krishna about the nature of a sthitaprajna(one who has attained happiness), Krishna answers that when a person vanquishes all the desires of the mind and finds happiness in his own self, he becomes a sthitaprajna. 

यस्त्वात्मरतिरेर् स्याि्आत्मत्रुप्तस्च मानर्:।
आत्मन्येर् च सन्तुष्ट: िस्य कायाम्न तर्द्यिे॥ (Chapter 3)
A person who enjoys his own company, who is satisfied with himself, who is happy with himself, he doesn’t owe anything to anybody.

बाह्यस्पर्शेष्वसक्तात्मा तर्न्दत्यात्मतन यत्सुखम्।
स ब्रह्मयोगयुक्तात्मा सुखमक्षयमर्ाप्नुिे॥(Chapter 5)
When a person is not interested in anything outside of himself, who knows 
happiness as being within himself, his status is equivalent to that of Brahman and he finds infinite happiness. 

In all the verses, it seems that Krishna is telling to be happy with and within oneself.  Is he preaching selfishness? Is he telling us just to concentrate on ourselves and give a damn to the world?

To comprehend this, I searched for day-to-day activities where I could apply this. We  see numerous motivating quotes today inspiring us to live for ourselves. Let us take a common scenario- I am unhappy because I don’t get to watch the channel of my choice at my home. The TV remote circulates in turn to every member in my house except me. So, if I must be happy, I must think of myself first. I must think of keeping myself happy and snatch the remote from anyone who has it whenever I want to watch the television. Is that so?
 
Or let us take a bigger example, I want to go on a trip on Sunday. My entire family is  busy. So, to keep myself happy, I go alone on a solo trip. Is this justifiable when my conscience asks me to wait for the time till everyone can make it? Krishna has
anyway asked to keep myself happy. 

If we contemplate on this, though Krishna has asked us to keep ourselves happy, he has always asserted a prerequisite in the first and the third of the above verses. He asks us to vanquish our desires first, to withdraw our interests in outward pleasures and then find happiness in ourselves. He has preached us to be happy with ourselves, in our own company. When that realization strikes us, we won’t wish for the company of television or a trip to make ourselves happy. The happiness we assume to have got through watching a movie or a trip is again, short-lived. To be permanently happy, we must learn to be happy when we are doing nothing. That is when we can say that a person is happy with himself. 

Probably, this leads to another question- Isn’t it called giving up? 

Whereas giving up is a very negative and passive phenomenon where you accept defeat, finding happiness within oneself is a purely positive, dynamic phenomenon. It is the ultimate victory. In the course of this revelation, we shall understand that everything is already in place. We are not entitled with any responsibility of setting things right.

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